Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
