yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
