y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
