well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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