When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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