I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
