Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
These tits shall not be calmed
he high fived his dick after we had sex
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize