you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize