So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
