Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
