i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize