woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
