I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
