Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
i love accidental penises.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
