I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize