Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Randomize
