so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Randomize
