I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Randomize
