If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
