it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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