**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
your room smells of hookers.
And success
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
