I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize
