some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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