A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
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