Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Randomize
