Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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