I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
