okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
