So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
