i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Just cropdusted the office
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
