so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
