This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I am available for nakedness
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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