The brown eye won't let me do that either.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Randomize
