I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
