i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
