Kiss
Puke
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
