How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
