Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize