there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
