Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
