still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
