so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
