He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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