Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize