Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
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