there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
