They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
