My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
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