i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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