I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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