what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
