we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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